me and the food around me. i like to eat, so listen up.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

so it turns out the brits are just like us

so theres this little trio of lads over there who call themselves the hipshakes. they are great dudes and the finest of musicians. regal and proper in everything they do. word has it they are masters of geography as well. i poked around in their little british heads about some food matters that could very well change your whole life.

lets say the hipshakes are wandering throuh a small out of the way english village and bruce stumbles upon an out of the way diner? what is the most likely of these choices and why:
a. daniel and andrew shake their heads and scoff at the idea
b. everyone gets very excited, because bruce just picked another winner
c.bruce goes in by himself and never returns

Well first of all it would in all likelihood be an olde englishe pub, not a diner. Now that is clarified, here's what would happen: we'd all go in, eat some nice food, maybe wash it down with a pint of bitter, have a good old chat, then when it's time to pay, Bruce would go very quiet and look sheepish, then we'd have to pay for his food as he is a lazy bum with no money.

on average how many english muffins does andrew consume in one weeks worth of time?

He prefers to be "in muff" more than eat muffins.

at tea time, do the hipshakes buck the venerable tradition and get totally drunk? please explain

At tea time we drink tea, if it was winter it would be possible to drop a little whiskey in to warm our bones, but you can't get drunk off a little whiskey.

when in america do the hipshakes long for scones? why?

Yes, for the simple reason you cannot get them there. But how is it pronounced? SK-oh-Ns, or SK-o-ns. Long sounding "o" or short?

if the hipshakes were to plan an entire world tour around food how would the tour look?

Podgy. Actually, the last tour was planned around food, and how Bruce couldn't afford any.

one day daniel arrives at the hipshakes command center bearing an abandoned box of canned process cheese product. one corner of the box is leaking and a scratching sound can be heard within. what are the likely reactions of andrew and bruce?

Bruce would take it to add to our fridge contents of mushrooms, parmesan cheese, gin, bitter lemon, giant bowl of jelly (jello, of course).


hopefully this clears up any questions anyone has about every single british person on earth.
heres their myspace:
now go buy their records so they do another american tour.

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