i ate a pb&j in my underpants last night at 2:46 am. whats the point.

the banbury cross i have to bear

i've been fiendish for doughnuts lately. i can't remember where this urge has sprung from. i could be dealing with some heavy latent shit, you guys. Occasionally when i was a kid, my mom, my aunt emily, my sisters and i would usually hit up some old tired ass doughnut shop in the midtown/east memphis area. the shop of choice was usually howard's doughnuts on summer avenue near perkins/goodlett (can't remember...it's been too long). one of my favorite smells ever is a very old doughnut shop. the scent of the pre-indoor smoking ban still lingers there (good luck finding that smell in salt lake city) as do the old timers, who still get the same 2 glazed doughnuts and cup of coffee like they've been getting since 1954. i'm always on the lookout for places that make doughnuts the way the old style places in memphis do. i found one in salt lake city (sans cigarette smell) and, thank the maker, it isn't all hip and excellent to be seen getting doughnuts there. I FUCKING LOVE BANBURY CROSS. when you walk in the door hold your breath for like a second so the smell of the outside world doesn't mingle with the smells going on inside. cassie, bryan and i went there on sunday to try their doughnuts. i was quite satisfied. you folks should know me well enough by now to know that i didn't go straight for the fancy sprinkle-y doughnuts, or the ever so alluring bavarian cream ones. and get thee hence bear claws! no, i needed to know how good their plain glazed doughnuts were. it's like a cheese pizza. if a pizzeria sucks at making a cheese pizza, forget it. same with d-nut shops. if the glazed doughnuts aren't absolutely stellar, don't bother. benchmarks, people! so yeah, the very simple and glazed d-nuts are what i got on sunday. they were pretty perfect. very light, very fluffy, not too yeasty, and not too sugary. you have to be gentle with them, otherwise they'll end up getting smushed (smooshed? nah, smushed)), and i for one do not like my d-nuts smushed. i went back today with my partner in crime jennie, with every intention of trying a new menu item. and guess what they had? fucking blueberry cake d-nuts. before today, my favorite blueberry cake doughnut could be found at select krispy kreme outlets. now, banbury cross is where i will shell out my "hard" earned money for these fluffy creatures. no joking, it's been a very very long time since i've found a blueberry cake doughnut this good in a mom and pop shop. today was momentous, dudes. we saw a pack of homeschool kids in sweatpants come in too.

"shit i been eating" or "shit, i been eating"

i eat a lot of crappy food. i am lazy, too lazy to walk to the grocery store. i can imagine a few of you are getting your reprimand face on. i also eat some pretty good food now and again.

here's a small list of places and the food i've quite enjoyed:

rich's burgers: bbQ burger (with coleslaw) and mac and cheese burger. rich's has decent peach cobbler too. i've tasted their green chili burger, also way good. the cook who usually works is kind of a goober, but delightfully efficient.

market street grill/seafood joint on 1300e 400s: these dudes have pretty sweet deal for a quart of clam chowder and a loaf of sourdough for like 8 bones.

b & d burgers is usually my go-to when i'm at work. typical meal there: cheeseburger and zucchini fries (with ranch to dip. fuck you fry sauce.). i will argue in behalf of their gyro as one of, if not theee, best in town. greek souvlaki #1 is probably a tie, but only becuase their rice is better. how can you eat a gyro without that rice yall?

the fucking maverick by my house has rico's burritos for $5.

village inn: southwestern potato pancake: carnitas, avocado, chili verde, and scrambled eggs: doubt me not.

duh, pie hole.

also, big daddy's has gone up a notch in my book when the dude working one night upsized our pizza for free and gave me and some amigos free drinks. i think they may have changed owners? they also have alot of extraneous non-pizza related food on their menu now.

while deli on 9th has a decent reuben, mine is still better. (whoa, this gives me an idea)

blue lemon cafe's braised beef sandwich is impossibly good. everyone give props to chaz when they eat one.

cakewalk vegan bakery is the shit. anything i've ever eaten there was perfect. madison, the new broken spells drummer works there a few days a week, go in and say hi. turns out cakewalk is pretty great for wasting a few hours. suggestion for kelly: MAKE NOODLE CABOODLE.

dragon grill is still mediocre in my mind. people keep telling me i "do it wrong", but i shouldn't have to go out of my way to make a resturant's food good. that's their job, not mine!

7-11 hot dogs are still killer. i tried their egg salad sandwich the other day. fyi, it needs pickle relish to set it off.

i think i'm gonna grab a rico's burrito on the way to bryan'n'cassie's. bryan and i are finishing el topo today. toodles.

EDIT:

HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN:

l&l barbecue on 4th south. i got loco moco. it is very hard to fuck this dish up. plus, they have brisk raspbery iced tea on tap.

score

sunday morning all you can eat breakfast buffet at the poplar pub $9.70.

stick it in my pie hole

so i think i found my favorite pizza joint in slc. pie hole. downtown salt lake. near a buncha bars and is open til 3am. $1 pbr cans. by the slice. as you all know (or fucking should) my benchmark for a pizzeria is the cheese and pepperoni. both of which rule at the pie hole. i scored a few fresh slices of both the other night and holy shit, it did it for me. while i'm sure people will argue with me that este is better, i really jive with this pizza. the crust has the right amount of chewy-ness. i don't find that in este's pizza. pie hole pizza is just a tad bit thinner than nicolitalia, and a tad bit thicker than este, which makes my little belly very happy. food aside, pie hole hasn't gotten quite as pretentious as este, which gives them a big leg up. i could eat pie hole pizza at pie hole in sweatpants and no one would look at me as if i had broken some rule i didn't know about. the staff are quite friendly and will chat with you. which i value quite a lot. they are vegan friendly for those who need it, and they use their own home-made nutritional yeast based "cheese", which is very tasty for those who've never tried it. for real, go to this pizzeria and have a blast.

http://pieholeutah.com/

more salt lake finds

guess who is going to be keeping super busy with finding new places to eat in salt lake? this guy. my buddy chaz is also a food dork, and he, along with his better half, melody, have done a lot of the leg work here in salt lake for me. the other night we hit up the HAPA taco place downtown across from sette bello. i got some carnitas tacos. killer. the tiniest amount of crisp on the carnitas were oh so awesome. they came with pinto beans and rice on the side. i love me some pinto beans. i also tried out their $5 margarita. it beat out the twilight's margarita by a long shot. HAPA will be where i go get margaritas. i had 2. people kept getting pissed that the kitchen was closed and as we were paying one guy stormed in and shouted the fuck word a lot at the staff. we all decided that was dumb so we gave our server a bigger tip. turns out he knew the guy.

yesterday we hit up koko's kitchen, a little japanese sushi bar downtown right off 6th south. i got some chicken katsu curry (brown curry) and it ruled. pparently the pot stickers are quite killer but the big deal according to meoldy is ramen. i will be eating ramen next time i go.

i can't believe how excited i am about all this. wait, yes i can.

lucking out

so i started working at graywhale's main store in salt lake city, which i'm beyond excited about. for a few reasons.

1. i'm working at the main store, which has a soooo much fun stuff to listen to. like if you're into jazz or world music, you'd be a fool to not peruse. sadly there ain't much wax in the racks. i've found some fun punk and a lot of the garage bullshit i like, some indie stuff too. makes alphbetizing very plesant, and fun. i know my abc's so much better now too.

2. i live very close to the store, so i can walk. it's up hill, so that means i'm gonna have a nice tight ass here in no time.

3. there's this little greek run burger joint RIGHT NEXT DOOR. their gyros rival greek souvlaki #1, mainly because the pitas are toasted and their tzatziki is loaded with dill. just throwing that out there. not to mention they roll out a pretty tasty burger. and the buns they use aren't the typical lawn turd white bread bun. they'r kinda chewy. good fries too. i'm hooked already. the place is called B&D. i have't tried their shakes because i don't care about shakes.